But I'm not a girl
What does #IWD #Balance4Better mean for you?
The week leading up to #IWD2019 seems like an ideal time to share some stories and this one is how social conditioning creates stereotypes.
I qualified as a Chartered Accountant and have worked in that profession most of my working life, including at the time of having children.
My son Blake was my first born and I felt it important to ensure he had access to a variety of toys, including dolls and tea sets (the kitchen bottom draw of plastics was always a favorite). He would also help me out at the calculator in my home office and learnt a little about the auditor's green ticks, and the symbols for added and cross added (yes these were paper files.)
I tried my best to display a balance of roles to my son, despite the fact that I was the one working part time, resulting in stagnated career progression and my "work" needed to "work" for the family. Despite the fact that I had a profession, my role had morphed into a traditional one of supporting the family unit and my (then) husband's work.
I recall a day I had withdrawn cash from the ATM and 4 year old Blake asked where did the money come from (yes out of the wall!) and this seemed like a good time to talk about finances and work. I told him the money came from being paid for our jobs and I asked him what sort of job did he think he might like to do?
Without any hesitation, he said "I'm going to be a fireman just like my dad"
But don't you want to be an Accountant like your mum?
But I'm not a girl!
At 4 years old, he didn't know how ironic that comment really was. I was one of only 4 or 5 professional females out of about 100 so it was funny that his view was that you needed to be a girl to be an accountant but it was also a smack in the face to realise how conditioning by what is around us influences who we think we are and what we think we can be.
This is unconscious (sometimes conscious) bias at the most basic and pervasive level, creating limitations by creating stereotypes.
In deference to all those who work so hard at breaking and challenging stereotypes, let's have a personal reflection on what we can do - nothing changes without us.
"My curiosity is driven by the passion to make things better for others" - Vicki Macdermid
This article was orginally published on LinkedIn on March 2, 2019.
